Hey man, just listened to your track. I agree with Jeady, the pluck sounds in the beginning/pads with the vocal do not match very well with the pitch of the original. Try to see if you can make them fit better, because I think you can do a lot with the original idea! If you listen to the vocal chops (which is you main melody) you can hear the bass going out of tune, which does not justify the music you are making. Try to see if changing the notes played in the bassline help you achieve more a in tune sound. On my headphones, the bass is really deep in the mix and is quite thin, maybe try to see if you could boost it a bit or give it more dynamics to see if it punches through more. The kick you are using is snappy and not that long, so there is a lot of room for you bass to kick through (that’s a good thing, because you use either: a long bass and a short kick or a long kick and a short bass). Especially in the genre that you are making, a long punchy basslines works best. Try to see if you add more things like hats and percussion to give your music more ear candy, so people will be interested to listen to the whole song, or make the song shorter (people tend to listen to music longer if they find new things in the song)! Good luck, you already have a good start!